Woh Woh Woh….
If you are reading this, which I am presuming to be a tautology, then you must be thinking that such a hard topic and that too just in the second blog of mine. Well, I don’t think there would be a better time than this to bring up this topic.
As you must have inferred from the topic, it is a bit controversial and is talked about a lot. But what I really want to express is not a way to keep your life balanced by making correct choices or what should be done in order to be successful or be balanced in your thoughts, rather I am going to focus on the internal brain transactions that take place while making a decision which would not only affect the person himself but also others in his life.
Have you ever been in a situation where you felt like taking a step ahead or backward but didn’t do what you really wanted to? If yes, then you have gone through the dilemma of choosing between what you think is correct and what you think is correct according to others( i.e, whole world except you ). There are no cases other than these because a person cannot have two contrasting thoughts at the same time, and if you think that such a possibility exists of two divergent simultaneous thoughts, then you are doing nothing better than fooling yourself by masking the correctness according to others, as your own thought while you already know in the back of your mind what you truly want. ( NOTE: Needs a little deep digging to understand; sorry for being so messy sometimes 😉 )
The problem till here can be resolved by just ignoring the thoughts of others’ thinking, but this is the point where the real BIG problem starts from. The problem of deciding what is in the domain of correctness for oneself, which needs surplus amount of thinking than one normally thinks, because no matter whatever one thinks, how much one thinks, in which direction one thinks, one can never decide upon the correctness of a correct decision-making thought. The problem arises when one starts to become too judgmental about oneself and starts keeping track of what would be the consequences of every possible choice one makes, what will be its outcomes in the future, is the decision apt, is one doing right or wrong. Such questions keep on bugging one’s brain invariably.
I would like to exemplify my above thought. One of my very close friend is a marvelous coder and is also a co-founder of a start-up company at my college and also a GSOCer. Just writing about all the work he is doing simultaneously made me anxious. Is it possible for a single human being to carry such a load in one go. Well to my amazement, the answer is yes. He has been doing this since a long time. If you are not a coder, it would be very hard for you to understand the amount of workload generated and how tiring and mind-boggling the work is, but just assume that it is like carrying tons of weight on your head and you really don’t know where is the end point your are destined to.
Now one day, we returned from a party and I encountered him. Knowing that he didn’t attend the party, I started praising about the food, ambiance and made many more good remarks about that place and started teasing him, like we all do. At first it was just a joke, later, he was a bit disappointed with my remarks, though he didn’t let it out on his face. He told me that sometimes he is also stuck in a predicament, feeling not well competent to choose the correct thing for himself, whether to keep doing what he is doing and neglect his life in friends and family ( which you almost ultimately do when you are a coder ), or to take a leap above all this and enjoy the time right now in college, because it is not going to return but you he has his whole life to do his ongoing job, which is a necessity. The question he put up was simple but the answer was not. I went back to my room and I tried to put myself into his shoes. Then, I was dispirited and in some corner of my heart proud of him, as I realized that whatever he is doing is extraordinary, unmatched and very rare people exist who can really be so determined and hardworking to carry the load he is carrying. So, I immediately ran to him to apologize and let him know that what he is doing is outstanding and second to none, so he should not let his brain populate thoughts regarding quitting or leaping over. But the question still remained as it is, the correctness of this decision in both the cases is uncertain. Henceforth, we both came to a conclusion that there is no assured answer to this query and the balance in our lives and thoughts only comes with the small decisions taken at small levels. No doubt that his work is important, but skipping a line of code and having a coffee with friends is worth it. Because you definitely won’t remember that line of code you wrote in those thousand lines but you would definitely remember how hardly your laughed that night on silly jokes.
The point here to note is that there is no correct or precise answer to what would lead to what and what should one be following to have a balanced life according to the choices one make.
Everything depends on the transactions your brain makes examining the pros and cons of a situation. Sometimes the decision is favoring and sometimes against, but at last my belief is that everything settles or averages out to where it began from because we end the same way we started our lives.
Yesterday morning @7.00, we both went to koffee++, for satisfying our empty tummas (stomach), after he stood up all night for his biotech examination and I stood up for fixing a bug, to be more precise understanding the bug. We had the same little discussion after corn flakes and soup and I taunted him again “You are just chopping off days of your life, not living it, and what’s the use of it, if you are not living it” and I again got the same look from him, and I still regret my that last statement.
I would like to conclude with a note that, don’t judge yourself or people on the choices they make at some instants because it may seem foolish to you right now, but one day you would understand the purpose and regret over your own judgment. No life is perfectly balanced, your decisions take you here and there and bring you back.
Note : –
1) Sorry, if I have been a bit harsh on coders. 😛
2) Those who didn’t understand the use of this photograph here, can please check out this photograph and its description telling you why I used it here on my blog, from flickr account link in about section of this blog.
3) Please do remember to leave a comment on the new theme, whether it is better than the previous one, or the previous one is better. 🙂
Please have a look at the attached youtube video on divided brain with some class animation.